So for 24/24 years of my life I've expected I will make money without any effort. Effort is hard for me. This is part of the reason why I started reaching out to the unicorn community with my art because I hoped that they would support me by leaving chests of treasure beneath my doorstep.
As my service comes to an end though, I have to ponder the harsh reality that apparently surviving in this cruel world requires "work" and "endurance" and "ambition." UGHHHH. Why did God bless me with so very many unmarketable skills? I've been thinking about centering my resume around my talent of having small fingers and narrow wrists that enable me to retrieve objects that have been dropped in tight places. There's a lot of fat people in America = a lot of fat fingers = a lot of people who can't retrieve their belongings that have been dropped in tight spaces.
I've been working to "tenderize" Booomer lately. He likes chewing fingers too much and needs to start liking snuggling. He's coming along very well. He doesn't chew my fingers much anymore and he likes to crawl onto my chest and sleep there while breathing his meat paste breath into my face.
So anyway, if anyone wants to hire me, let me know.
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The chewing fingers habit might have something to do with that time you taught him how to eat off your finger
ReplyDeleteyou might also work as a typist for those unable to write text messages on the extremely small keyboards of their extremely expensive phones.
ReplyDeleteAmanda that is a very astute observation! I hadn't made that connection.....
ReplyDeleteEllen: Great idea. I smell a business venture.